It's just experience.
On the one hand, you have to be brutal with your *writing*, you can't be too
close to the material. You have to be able to look at how you present
something from as objective a point of view as you can.
On the flip side, you have to be as faithful and true to your characters as you
possibly can. There's the person and there's the telling of the person, and
they're two different creatures. Learning how to differentiate the two is just
a matter of experience.
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